23rd November

Solar Question of the Day from Celtic Devotional by Caitlin Matthews
23rd of November:
What is the source of your deepest refreshment?
First thoughts, gosh I have to find a way to organize this so that I can simply think without having my practice disturbed by ‘blogging’. So, I took action. Action, while sometimes feeling difficult, can be a source of refreshment. Next thoughts…This is sooo going to be like a forth step but on the plus side. I cannot recall really doing that before. I check me out daily to flush out the defects. To me, perhaps leaving what is left says they are ‘good’. The aspects of the refreshment though, I bet are like ….i was angry at my boss cause she’s a bitch…like an early 4th step. I had to go back to that statement quite often and make a conscious effort to see all of the parts, and see them as MINE. Not someone else’s. Not outside of me, causing poooooooooooor me to be subjected. So, I am thinking that some of the images I choose to post refresh me. Why? Uhm, they are pretty? (well i probably think so-ha) They smell good. They make my heart sing or fly or to be still. I can hear God in them! I am feeling grounded for some of them–or I could, if I took the time, at the time, though I can always begin again at any moment. Is hearing God refreshing? or does the hearing lead to something else? are there other things that lead to the same feeling? Do I know what to call it or how to express it without a layer in the front of it?

Just back from the movie, that I went to, by myself! I went in my comfy clothes with my hair still sticking up from bed this morning. There were only three other people in the entire theater and I got to have my own thoughts and my own feelings and to simply enjoy and value my own agenda! I always forget what this feeeels like. I may speak up and claim to need it and claim that I feel bombarded with everyone and everything else in my way, but I always forget, until the moment I feel it. I understand shielding myself. I’m not sure that I can always DO it. IF I do it by will, it is stressful and it makes me have to be defensive, like ready for a fight. I am not relaxed and enjoying who I am. I dislike it if my tumbling thoughts sound like rationales for holding onto things or a complaint. This was said in a moment of awe and joy at how it works.

1 Response to 23rd November

  1. Elisa's Spot says:

    At Day’s End, today’s Lunar Meditation:
    The unfolding vision of your life.
    While I was looking at how to do the lunar meditation which involves my using a chart effectively, which I cannot seem to do ‘properly’, I ended up thinking it was day 11, but for some reason I had my fingers in the meditations for Lughnasadh. The evening meditation was “The glory of the sunset”. I laughed and was glad, as tonight when coming out of the grocery thinking what a nice day I’d been granted, the rainy sky was lit up hot pink with a sunset in the rain clouds. I was very excited, so much so, that I got others in the parking lot to stop rushing and to look and then to stop and share a smile and an oooo and an ahhhh with those near to them. Just for today, ok just for this moment of typing, I’m not looking to the vision for my life. Less plot more do. Another way to interpret unfolding vision for me, would be to simply journal the next thing and the next thing that I do or experience.

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